Die Clique

By the time I had been at work for several hours I was as sick as the proverbial dog. I had been mainling sudafed for days and finally the headache moved in and whacked me good. I'm sure I looked pale and wan and everybody sent me home which I do now by subway because if I'm going to be sick then I'd rather be sick on the subway rather than spend $15 to be sick in traffic! But I desperately wanted to be well enough to take Kate to the first group of Chinese American kids who meet once a month and discuss I don't know what. It would also give me access to a group of Moms who are struggling or not with some of my issues. Kate agreed reluctantly to go and then to go on to dinner at a local Chinese restaurant. So, it's one hour of chat among the girls and then off to St. Mark's place for what I thought was very good food. I had managed to drug myself into welldom and had thoroughly good time. I'm very comfortable with women who have also adopted because many of them are not 20 or 30 somethings. They are grown ups.

Saturday was Chinese with Yue and then soccer. For Kate. I was still feeling pretty lousy but whipped myself into getting to the hairdresser. Being unable to make a hair appointment would signal a terminal illness. And then once I arrived looking all snappy and putting on a brave face I had the wrong day. The wrong day. how pitiful is that. But something was done and then I went home and back to bed. In the end I decided that I was just making myself sick! And to get over it. To murder people in a righteous manner. of course I also managed to lose 2 pounds. A welcome loss.

But as I felt better I realized that I wanted to go back to Maine for a weekend. I;ve been thinking about the wonderful path down to the beach from the house and the smell of the trees and the ultimate opening in the trees with it's calming view of boats bobbing in the sound. Unfortunately it's a little early in the year for me to be feeling wistful about Maine. I'm supposed to be calm and centered because of Maine.